Sisterly Love

A few years ago I dated, albeit rather briefly,  a guy who my Aunt picked out for me on Match.com.  I was showing her and my Mum one evening after the pub, men who I was thinking of contacting online.  She'd picked him in particular because a few of his photos were of him travelling around South America and he'd had a shaved head in some, hair in others, and was a good looking guy and probably had some interesting stories to tell.  


Dan hadn't long returned from travelling and didn't currently have a job, so our first date was at a cheap crappy place he'd suggested that you'd find in a retail park or cinema complex.  I'm not going to say the name because quite frankly I am a little embarrassed about it!  The meal was a bit strange because he had an illness which meant he needed to avoid eating certain things.  What I gathered from this was that he could eat greasy food and hot curries (weird).  Anyway, we just shared some greasy deep fried starters and had a couple of cocktails, but the evening went well, restaurant and food choice aside.  We chatted about his travels and he had some interesting stories to tell.  He also talked about his sister.  In his words she was "very pretty with long blond hair, slim, and a really funky dresser".  Alright love, it's me you're on the date with!  


We had a few more dates, and on one evening in particular, after seeing a movie (which I'd sprung for because he was skint), we had our first sleepover night at my house.  We came home sober and well behaved.  We were having a cuppa and a snog in the lounge.  On closer inspection I noticed he had very neat eye brows.  I asked if they were naturally like that.  He replied that he has them waxed.  Oh, I have a metro-sexual here.  After a bit we went upstairs and I left him in my room while I nipped to the bathroom to 'freshen up'.  When I went back to my room Dan was in bed, in his undies, sitting up, with greasy stuff all around his eyes.  "Bang goes the romance then" I thought.  So, was I meant to just strip off and get in?  Isn't he going to lay me down on the bed and take my clothes off for me, one by one?  Maybe notice that I've got really nice expensive matching undies on?  Nah?  Okay then.  This isn't what was meant to happen!  I said "Whats that all around your eyes?"  "It's eye cream" He said.  As if this was normal.  "Oh... okay".  I did what I had to and stripped off and got in.  I didn't even bother doing it seductively, while humming a strip tease tune.  I felt like an old married couple already and it was only the first sleepover.  When I saw him out in the morning I noticed a strange patch on the living room wall, just above the back of the sofa.  On closer inspection I realised it must have come from his hair gel!  Oh my god... "SOUL GLOW" (other hair gels and styling products are available).  

After a few days we met up again and went for a few drinks.  In the pub I asked "So what have you been up to today?"  Dan explained that his sister got clipped round the head by a passing bus in London the other day (how unfortunate), and while she was okay (shame), work let her have a couple of days off to rest.  So he'd spent the day round there.  He said when he got there he asked his sister what she'd been up to (she was getting bored of being in doors) and she said she'd shaved her bits.  I nearly spat my drink in his face "She said what?"  I asked, mortified.  "She said she'd shaved her lady garden" he said, as if this was as totally normal conversation to have with your sibling.  Then he said "...and she showed me and said "Look!" to him" (while saying this he mimed pulling the front of his trousers down and flashing his bits.  My face must have been a picture.  I didn't quite know what to say.  "Are you kidding?  Your sister flashed you her privates and you act like that's completely normal?" I said.  He replied "Me and my sister are really close though.  We go on holidays in a four some, with her mate and my mate.  She said to me one time in the pool on holiday that she thought she needed a boob job, and she whipped them out of her bikini top and asked me what I thought.  You know, it's just no big deal between us really". Hmm.  "I think I am going to have trouble with this one" I thought.


Now... I have brothers.  I love them to bits, but under no circumstances, not even if I'd been stung by a jelly fish and needed one of them to pee on me, am I flashing my genital area at them or would I condone them flashing theirs at me.  No way.  Uh-uh.


Dan and I didn't for much longer after this.  Is it weird that since this guy I have always been keen to find out if there is a sister, how close they are and how old she is?  I know from being a sister that they can be quite territorial over their brothers, but to me, it sounded like Dan and his sis made the perfect couple.  Real 'soul mates'.